It’s Us For Them
A lyric from “Us For Them,” a powerful song from the “One Wild Life: Soul”album, a trilogy of albums
Gungor is releasing this year exploring the trichotomy of soul, spirit, and body within humanity, and it’s relation to faith (and every other thing, in fact) within our complex world.
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I sat across the table from a woman last week whose grandfather had passed away three days prior to our coaching meeting. As we greeted each other, briefly shaking hands in a formal conference room at the financial company where she works, I immediately became aware of a few things:
Our initial awareness coaching session on her talent theme assessments would likely be quite different from the 14 other employees we had met with the previous week.
This woman was clearly grieving the loss of a beloved family member, and was honouring the
loss of her family member through a series of religious customs that affected her appearance.
I probably shouldn’t have shaken her hand out of respect for said cultural tradition.
My heart hurt for her loss, and for the scrambling, chaotic nature of death that upends every
human being.
As a white, American male who seeks to follow the way of Jesus Christ as deeply as I possibly
can, I was about to have a 90-minute conversation with a fellow human being who couldn’t be
more starkly different than myself: a coloured, South African female who (at least from outward
appearance) was a practicing member of the Muslim faith, likely observing both the fasting of
Ramadan and the grieving process for a family member who has recently passed away.
Given the increasing insanity currently clamouring for attention in our world, what was I to say to her?
Fumbling through a few words of sympathetic condolence as best as I possibly could offer as a complete stranger, myself the epitome of ‘the other,’ as our coaching session unfolded, I experienced the familiar beats of a typically engaged client: inquisitive questions, heartfelt reflection, and honest, forthright thought about the implications of strengths-based development within the environments of work, home, and family.
In other words, a wonderful, personal, significant coaching session, as impactful as every other session I had over the past two weeks.
Why am I reflecting on such obvious, even simplistic conclusions to a coaching meeting?
In part, because of the prevailing headwinds building throughout our world at this moment: an increasing determination to classify everyone as either ‘for us’ or ‘against us,’ an either/or mentality towards faith, sexual orientation, racial prejudice, moral position, violence and war-mongering that demands a black and white response in a world filled with endless shades of grey, a political environment that spews hatred, toxicity, and every ugly impulse of the human character, regardless of country or party, and on and on ad nausea. By the way – this is equally true with the upcoming elections in South Africa on August 3rd as it is of the political circus that is the 2016 US presidential campaign.
In a larger part, because I am an equal culprit in this mess within my own life: I regularly, consistency misrepresent those most dear to my heart (Just ask my wife how accurately I listen to her!) for the sake of my own agenda, my own self-preservation, my own ethical stance, my own faith perspective, or most frequently, my own convenience. I have become conditioned to see the worst in people, and I project that evil impulse upon their hearts whether or not it is true in reality!
As Christ-followers, we know, but often conveniently dismiss (Perhaps I should say, I know, but often
conveniently dismiss) basic truths central to walking with Jesus in the restoration of all things for good in this world. Such as:
Listen first, be slow in speaking, and downright glacial in becoming angry: “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.” (James 1:19-20).
Our response to others is not self-righteous judgment, but honest self-reflection that leads
to personal transformation: “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you
judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why
do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay not attention to the plank in
your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when
all the time there is a plant in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own
eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:1-5)
Everyone – family, friend, and ‘enemy’ – is our neighbour, and worthy of compassionate respect and self-sacrificial acts of mercy: “A Samaritan*, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him. The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’‘Which of these three do you think was a neighbour to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?’ The expert in the law replied, ‘The one who had mercy on him’ Jesus told him, ‘Go and do likewise.’ (Luke 10:33-37).
*Cultural Note on Samaritans today: In Jesus’ day, Samaritans were widely reviled and hated as ‘the enemy’ most despicable to faithful Jewish believers, to the degree that most Jewish people would travel great distances out of their way to avoid walking through Samaria. A Samaritan man showing this depth of compassionate love to a Jewish brother is the ancient equivalent of an ISIS terrorist caring for a wounded American soldier, or a homosexual man bandaging the wounds of a fundamentalist Christian, or an ANC member transporting a wounded Riot Police officer to a hospital in the midst of the South African apartheid struggle of the late 1980’s, or a member of the EFF party in today’s toxic South African political climate welcoming a sick Afrikaner into their home until they became well again. Jesus’ point: The person least like you is your neighbour, and you are to love him or her without judgment, condition, or demand that they respond in kind. As Gungor pens in their provocative anthem “Us For Them:”
See the face of Christ
See the mercy in His eyes
Every valley shall be lifted high
Now our enemies are blessed
The heavy laden rest
For His judgment is love
His judgment is love
Let me be as transparently obvious as I possibly can: I write this for myself, and for my own personal
transformation. I don’t want to do these basic human things with those I am closest to, let alone my
‘enemies’ around the world. And yet, these truths are central to not only the human experience, but core to following Jesus in the way of God in this world.
I pray that your own experience of self-reflection brings the conviction, insight, and courage to make ‘every mountaintop low’ that needs levelling in your own heart and life. For truly, this is the only way we change.
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“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbour and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” (Jesus, turning up the heat on all of us in Matthew 5:43-48).
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When the lines are drawn
When you’re in or out
When it’s us or them
And we shame the doubt
It is all a lie
All we ever really need is love
There’s no need to shed more blood
Look upon the cross
Look upon the cross
See the face of Christ
See the mercy in His eyes
Every valley shall be lifted high
Now our enemies are blessed
The heavy laden rest
For His judgment is love
His judgment is love
There is no more guilt
There is no more shame
All our darkest sin
All our deepest pain
Blessed are the poor
All the lonely broken lost and torn
See a kingdom comes to us
A war that’s fought with love
Our only war is love
Prepare the way of the Lord
Wielding mercy like a sword
Every mountaintop will be made low
Know, He holds the earth like dust
And his judgment comes to us
And his judgment is love
His judgment is love
We will not fight their wars
We will not fall in line
Cause if it’s us or them
It’s us for them
It’s us for them
We reject the either or
They can’t define us anymore
Cause if it’s us or them
It’s us for them
It’s us for them
(Gungor, Us For Them)
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