“Redemption and the grace of God comes to our present tense.” (David Crowder)
prodigal |ˈprɒdɪɡ(ə)l| adjective : having or giving something on a lavish scale: The dessert was prodigal with whipped cream. A thoughtful epic like only Crowder can release. Do your soul and ear buds a favour and take a listen to Crowder’s latest.
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“Redemption and the grace of God comes to our present tense. God doesn’t love our future self more than he loves us as we are right now. The blood and sacrifice of Christ covers everything we have done.”
(David Crowder, on Crowder’s new song “Forgiven” from the recent release “American Prodigal”)
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I turned 37 yesterday. In between the odd pains awakening me most mornings, running after my daughter, and trying to help my (very) pregnant wife find the elusive position that brings her body comfort, I realised something: I am no longer young. On the one hand: my birthday was one of the best in recent memory, filled with meaningful moments, intimate conversation and connection with my family, and thoughtful gifts that speak to and affirm the heart of who I am. I loved every moment of it.
On the other hand, it bears repeating: I am getting older. I clearly feel mixed about this, if I pause to examine a bit below the surface. My parents are getting older, my daughter is growing up way too fast, a second kid is on the way, circa March 2017, and my wife and I realised yesterday that we have now spent my last 8 birthdays together, which is awesome and crazy in the same breath. We couldn’t even remember what we did for my birthday in 2011 (which isn’t strange, actually, considering I rarely remember what I ate for lunch yesterday).
If I give pause to the gnawing insecurities within me on my worst days, I wonder if I am making the most of my life. Am I actually becoming the person God intended for me to be in the apple of his eye one day long ago? Have I made the right choices in career, work focus, and how I have actually served my neighbour in love? Have I loved my wife and daughter with every ounce of blood, sweat, and tears, or is there a large piece of my soul that remains unrefined, stubbornly self-centred, trying desperately to remain immune to change? Why do I return at times to the folly of my youth?
And then a stray thought from a short song story video slays the growing insecurities and unhelpful
questions, and brings a peace that only God can offer. “Redemption and the grace of God comes to our present tense. God doesn’t love our future self more than he loves us as we are right now. The blood and the sacrifice of Christ covers everything we have done.” (David Crowder, on Crowder’s new song “Forgiven” from the recent release “American Prodigal.”). I find my soul quieting, my mind sharpening, my heart enlarging, and a calmness descending once again: God knows exactly where I am, isn’t thrown off by my progress or seeming lack thereof in life, and is here with me. In the present, I am loved, as I am.
We often whisper to our daughter as she is falling asleep, “You are loved for who you are, not for who you are not. Just be Mia.” It’s amazing how often we need this reminder as well.
You are loved for who you are.
Not for who you are not.
Just be yourself.
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