Why Men Are Particularly Susceptible
by Chris Kamalski
I do not understand with any sociological authority the complex reasons behind the growing epidemic of immaturity that delays the passage to adulthood embedded in the very nature of humanity becoming older, other than from my limited perspective as a mid-30’s adult male who has been married for several years and recently became a father six months ago. That generic biographical descriptor contains a unique point of view however that I inescapably am; namely, male. As a man, I reflect upon my life experiences as a cultural mis-mash of sorts, fumbling around the best that I can, trying to make sense of God’s presence in my life while desperately needing modeling throughout the masculine journey.
There is a fascinating phenomena called “musthing” that takes place within elephant herds filled primarily with young teenage males whereby they become increasingly aggressive, violent, and out-of-control, experiencing a severe spike in testosterone levels possibly attributed to the passage of adulthood. Teenage males that begin to musth are almost impossible to stop, and often become so aggressively violent that they need to be put down or separated in full from the rest of the heard. However, behavioral scientists have found that one thing prevents this destructive cycle of behavior: the presence of older-male father-figures as a stabilizing influence within the young adult male population.
Donald Miller first introduced me to this concept within his memoir on being raised by a single mom, Father Fiction*. In a Christianity Today interview upon the books release, he commented,
“Without the presence of older elephants in their lives to mentor them, these elephants remained in suspended musth cycles, which essentially is like a puberty phase. With an older male elephant there, their musth cycle will only last about three days. It's a very uncomfortable time, but it's eased when an older male elephant is in their life. But for the elephants on this reserve, with no older males, their musth cycles did not end. They basically began to lose it. They acted out aggressively and violently toward other creatures. They began to withdraw from their tribe. When they introduced older male elephants into that community of orphaned elephants, their musth cycles ended. They were able to be normal. It was very interesting to me that there is evidence in the animal kingdom that you are changed biochemically by your relationship to something outside of yourself. Young men are changed by their relationships with older men. There is evidence of that.”
Could the celebration of immaturity that is delayed adolescence with adult males actually be intrinsically linked to a similar phenomena within human beings? Could the absence of genuine, intimate, healthy male role models in so many bull-headed teenage males be a core reason for the inability, let alone the willing refusal, to grow up? Is the presence of collective wisdom among a community of older males a determining factor for the maturity of the young and foolish boys?
Reflecting on my own story, I cannot conclude anything other than a resounding YES.